Hi, from the middle of the Atlantic Ocean. I am on my way back to the US after 11 days in the UK visiting family and friends. From here, the girls and I travel to our new home in Chattanooga, Tennessee.

That word, "home." I have always wished there were more words to explore and elaborate on it.

Home to me has always been and will always be England, St Albans and my childhood home more specifically.

Home will always be when I am with my family: Steve and the girls. A non-place place, a feeling that I get when we are our little unit, our little team. It's comfort and familiar, wherever we are.

Home is St. Louis, a version of home I now need to allow myself to let go of, to let rest in my heart with the other places I have lived in and loved: Lexington (KY), Philadelphia (PA), Big Rapids (MI), Aliso Viejo (CA), and Bloomington (IN).

Yep, I have lived in a lot of states for an immigrant to the US.

I often say that there is a little piece of my heart left, a string that ties me to the people there, the places that are important to this journey through life (maybe arteries and veins are a more relevant analogy), and as I prepared to leave St. Louis before I went to the UK, I felt like I was ripping out that piece of my heart, that it wasn’t ready.

I wasn’t ready.

And yet, my time in the UK allowed me to process through, with my parents in St. Albans, my sister and her family in Northern England, my aunties close to the border of Wales, and the rest of my family and friends I left behind 19 years ago. I have lived in the US for almost 20 years, and every time I go back to England I get the same giddy, excited feeling as I come in to land at Heathrow, as I walk past the big banners with peoples' arms outstretched saying “Welcome," and best of all, as I go through the double doors to see my loved ones' beaming faces smiling at me.

Years may have passed, but the longing never really stops; the tears of leaving and the pain of being so far away that I forever feel in my heart never ceases. I am always missing someone, somewhere.

Then I return to those places I have loved, and I see that the love never fades. The decades of distant relationships and the impact of how these humans shaped me into who I am never ceases. The feeling is always the same: love and admiration for them.

I know I will feel that with St. Louis too, just as I feel it with all the other places I have lived.

I also know I can always find joy, find my people somewhere, my place in any place, my home in any city.

Over the past ten days, I have felt something else creeping in too: excitement. Nerves, of course, especially for the girls settling in to a new school, but right alongside it is an excitement to explore, an excitement to settle, to find my new favorites.

Sometimes we crave the comfort we know; often leaving it feels jarring and jagged, and yet there is a part of it that makes us feel most alive.

I am sure there will be setbacks ahead in Chattanooga, moments I wish with all my heart we could be back in St. Louis, just as there are moments my heart aches for Southern California, for Philadelphia, for St. Albans.

The line in the sand though, the line that was drawn when I boarded that plane in England, I thought it was going to make it harder. Instead, this time has allowed me the space to know I'll be okay.

And whatever life changes and curveballs lie ahead, you will be okay too. It’s cliche to say that time heals all wounds, and yet we all know it's true.

I have taken a social media break since I left for England, and as always, it has been glorious. It got me thinking that once I download it again, I am going to unfollow a lot of accounts I enjoy. Specifically, the ones that are nostalgic, funny, or silly. Sure, they bring me that quick hit of dopamine, but it ends up spiraling into time I simply don’t want to spend on my phone. The more grounded forms of joy feel so much better than all those dopamine hits combined.

Usually when I re-add, I just hope for the best and hope I won’t get re-addicated. This time, I am gonna try something different; maybe it works, maybe it doesn’t. Maybe you want to give that a try too.

Maybe not ;) either way is okay.

I was really excited to see that Boulderthon joined our Racing For Sustainability membership. This is the biggest race we have had join so far, and a big event to help us grow into our goal of making sustainability as integral to races as start and finish lines.

How does this relate to you?

If you haven’t already, send this along to your local races; tell them it's important to you to sign up. Your race directors listen; you are their guiding light. This is a way you can do your part with a simple email.

Send them this link:

If that feels too scary, our goal at Racing For Sustainability is to get the running world to prioritize sustainability and climate. Your support will help us build towards our goal of a place where runners can find sustainable races near them.
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“You will never be completely at home again, because part of your heart will always be elsewhere. That is the price you pay for the richness of loving and knowing people in more than one place.” - Miriam Adeney

Thanks to our partner, AG1

To say the last month has been chaotic is a major understatement. From job offer to move in six weeks, including an 11 day trip to the UK where the girls and I visited three separate cities, ranging from three to five hours away from one another, we have been stretched thin. Or more accurately, I have been stretched thin, way too thin....especially while running 65-75 miles per week. Phew.

Thankfully, I have my comfort blanket, my safety net to know that whatever I ate, I am taken care of nutritionally (and believe me, when I am home in England, I make the most of what England has to offer!!) if I start my day with my AG1. One scoop contains 75+ vitamins, minerals, pre/probiotics and superfoods to support whole body health.

YES PLEASE, I need that!

And actually, there is something very exciting coming from AG1 soon that also made sure I fell asleep with ease at night, even in the week packing up the house in St. Louis when there was an endless to-do list (no, I didn't complete it all!).

More soon on that ;) or you can read about it here​

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Be kind to one another, yourself, and this beautiful planet of ours.

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