Well, it’s official.

I am having surgery next month. Achilles surgery, to be exact. While it is scary to think about it, I am mostly relieved that I am doing something to address it. I am grateful for my body that I am 35 years old and haven’t really had any major medical interventions ...other than of course, childbirth x 2 (and I was very fortunate that my births were about as smooth as they could possibly be) and a root canal on my front tooth.

I made it through 14 years of serious running with very few injuries- a calf strain, glute strain, and a stress reaction was about the extent of it. Kind of amazing when I think about how much stress my body was under with my REDS (underfueling) for years on end. Part of me does wonder if this is somehow related though. When people asked me what the long term repercussions of REDS were, I always said, “I guess I will find out," and maybe this is it.

That said, surgery is surgery, and I do understand that this is a risk, and you have likely noticed that I have been talking about my heel/Achilles/injury a lot over the past year. It has significantly impacted my training and life in general. I don’t want to be in pain with this for the rest of my life. I don’t want it to stop me from living the life I want to live. We have given the time to exhaust other options to see if I could live with it through a conservative approach.

But I just don’t function that way. I would if I had to. If that was the way it was gonna be, I would learn to adapt and get on with it, but it doesn’t have to be. I have heard that message over and over, you don’t have to live like this.

So what is it? My body has grown extra bone on my left heel where the Achilles attaches and there is a significant amount of tendon damage in there. My surgeon used the word awful when describing how bad my Achilles is, compared to others he has seen. And that is certainly not a compliment, right?! It looks like I have half a golf ball stuck on my Achilles tendon, and as you can imagine, that doesn’t feel good.

I had a long conversation with the surgeon yesterday, and had my amazing friend/chiropractor/sports rehab doc, Brennan, there with me on the call. And I am incredibly thankful he was there.

Here's the deal:

There is no amount of rest or conservative treatment that will make it go away. I asked, "If I took an entire year off would it be healed? Could I get back to dream chasing?"

The answer was no. Maybe for a little while, but then I would be back in the exact same position, with more damage incurred.

So here I am, and after speaking to many elite runner friends who have had the surgery, I have decided to go ahead and do it. Every single one of them was glad they did it and encouraged me to do it too, so that I can have a life post-surgery without this being the center of every run I do, without having precisely three pairs of shoes that sometimes feel okay. Every other pair hurts, every step.

All the elite runners I spoke to tried to run through it or train around it for years before getting to the point that they couldn’t take it anymore. All of them wished they had done it sooner. My surgeon works exclusively on feet and ankles and is considered one of the best in the world for this surgery.

I have never been someone to run through pain, and that’s not to say this will never bother me again. My recovery journey will be a long road ahead, and I have been warned that it will be painful for a year post-surgery when I run, BUT I do believe my friends who tell me that it is significantly better post-surgery, that they can run far and run well (Zach Miller finished 2nd at UTMB this year).

I understand that for some of you, your reaction might be to email me and warn me away from surgery, to push back, and I love that you care so much, your kindness and concern is such a gift, but believe me, I have exhausted every “yeah but” you can think of.

I have thought this through, long and hard, for over six months. I have goals and dreams I still want to chase after, and this gives me a chance to do so. If I do not do it, those things are not going to happen, not to the level I want them to. I want to run ultras and see how fast I can go. I want to chase adventures that will show what I am capable of. I want to do a 100 mile race someday. Without the surgery, that is simply not going to happen.

Maybe it works, maybe it doesn't, but I am someone who follows my gut, follows my heart, and this is the direction I believe is best. I don't believe there is a wrong choice here (or ever), it was the way it was meant to be for my life, and that is okay!

So while I typically encourage you to respond, in this instance, this is my choice and I have consulted with people who have dedicated their entire careers to these kinds of injuries. All I ask of you is your love and support. I trust myself, and for that reason, I know I am doing the right thing.

I know there will be a lot of lows along the way, and I will learn a lot about who I am, I will grow in ways I cannot possibly expect. But I am ready, and I will be sharing that journey as I go with you along the way.

This week on the Running For Real podcast...

Here's the official description:

March 8th is International Women’s Day, a global day celebrating the social, economic, cultural, and political achievements of women. To celebrate it, Tina reached out to some of the women who inspire her and asked them to answer one of these questions:

What is one piece of advice you would give to women listening?

What do you wish the women listening knew?

What is your favorite thing about women supporting women?

If you want to be inspired yourself, be sure to listen to this episode.

​

Here's the real deal:

I don't relisten to podcast episodes I record. Maybe once or twice a year I had an intense conversation with a guest that I didn't really get to process all of during our converastion, but beyond that, I simply don't.

With this episode though?

This one was so powerful; I have listened to it three times already (since Friday!) and each time I have learned something new.

This is one of my favorite episodes ever, one I will certianly be saving for tough moments ahead. Listen up; this is a beautiful, beautiful episode.

Running NYC Half this weekend? Come join me for a plog on Saturday. I would love to see you (and will have copies of Becoming a Sustainable Runner), if you would like one.

I joined Angie and Trevor on Marathon Training Academy podcast this week, it was a fun one.

I would love for you to answer this two easy question survey for me. It will take 30 seconds. Make sure you read the note at the top.

​

Confidence isn’t optimism or pessimism, and it’s not a character attribute. It’s the expectation of a positive outcome. – Rosabeth Moss

​

Thanks to our partner, Precision Fuel & Hydration

Welp. I hoped I would be using Precision for multiple ultramarathons this year, but as you can probably guess, that is out. BUT, I have already decided this time is going to be a time of growth, which means I can practice one thing to take a step closer to being ready to run fast next year, and that is practicing taking in fuel, lots of fuel, while exercising. I have already been doing that through long bike rides (biked 66 miles last weekend), and intend to train my stomach to be able to handle much more fuel than I have in the past...which in itself, takes time. I am grateful for that opportunity to grow.

Precision gels go down so easy, I don't get flavor fatigue and they aren't overly sweet. Best of all, they have 30g carbohydrates per gel, but they also have 300g gel packs called flow packs, which allow you to bring one container for multiple servings, making it environemntally better too.

As a friend of mine, you can get 15% off your order below

I would also encourage you to make the most of their fuel and hydration planner (its free!) if you don't know how much fuel and electrolytes you should be taking. It's really helpful.

Be kind to one another, yourself, and this beautiful planet of ours.

​

Enjoying these? Why not forward to a friend who may enjoy. Encourage them to sign up and get these emails on a Monday too.

​

​